Date: Fri, 31 Aug 2001
Subject: Re: Jacques and John

ammonides diodoros wrote:

> one should remember all those nasty things they said about the lovely boy
> Chatterton, that saintly little Theseus... do you think he would bounce and
> scowl like Jeffrey Jullich


Dear M. 'Aimonides ("M" for "M'sieur"!)

Jackie and I ("Jacques DeBrot," that is) transmit heartfelt thank you from here
on floor for your sweetest-flavored epistolary novel installment yet, you
one-man revival you. (Much appreciation for witty Quintus Horatius Flaccus
allusion!) PLUS germ-free air kisses to those four, unseasonable "boys in the
band" from You-Know-Who! (J.A. = Jah? Rastafarian deity incarnation?) His
late-breaking band name contest entry: try "Ihr Glocken von Marling". Back to
the topic (poetry) in a min'.

Guitar-strummin' jailbait sure know Fifth Avenue Botox injections have "Jullich"
facial musculature too rigid, too unnatural, to "scowl" (Ho ho! "scowl" as
concealed "scow" Shoptaw word, meaning vessel with square ends and--- flat
bottom!? Insulting sagging posterior?!) during mid-life crisis vanity phase.

John took whole minutes out of writing truly epochal verse, not at all
self-imitative, to clear up positively everything. He says HE (John) asked
reapme "interview" questions under name-change "Jacque Debro" ( ) and --- guess who! --- Jackie "DeBrot" giveth fatted kine answers unto The Master with
misnomer "Joh Ashber", as zem discipline! So, all laughter. All comic relief.
Exhaling thunderous sighs (whew!) as if bee-punctured bagpipe music. It was so
VIRTUALITY-oriented in their mid-to-late-1900s cleverness, I'd say--- nay! So
Virtuoso of 'cques 'brot. (Marcella D. protests over "vir-" root etymology and
typical males. But you know "her".)

Found remaindered copy, not at all encrusted, of that K.K. Ruthven Felsifying
title thou inquirest after O these many days (July 25th, ingenious
Oulipo one-letter-later-in-alphabet substitution: "K.K." indeed) --- and guess
where! --- in the COLOMBARIUM! I can't put it down.. And, shop-talk, just
wanted to recommend latest ish of Andy Felsinger's new "e-'zine" for
truly thrilling Kent Johnson proposing --- here's the scream! --- adopting
peudonyms to fool everyone, to follow us around, as best my understanding, as at
costume ball! guessing handsome masked man's identity. But only one peevish
question: Say nicknames were one. F'r 'xample: Jacques could be "Jack" and John
could be "Jack." Then---?

But also, K. Johnson speaks of "Flatland" (Remember that old chestnut?
Geometry fantasia.) So appealing, flatness! Not distended, not convex. As
flat belly is highly sought after by gymnasium-subscribers.

Off to Fifth Avenue for Botox 'jection now. Private jet revvin' up for jaunt to
Antilles for holiday weekend full moon organ enlargement (just Cacques and I!
{and pilot} the servant class on strike, so foraging for ourselves on knees
digging at tree roots bare-handed).

And thanks, too, for not existing. For being the Yasusada you are (AND lovin'
it)! Oh. And that Jacquesline Kentedy Onansis Best Loved Poems book. Can't
find it anywhere. Hmph. Checked Rizzoli's, checked Shakespeare & Co. in
Paris. Where else to look! You don't think September 26th publication date
could be delaying things, do you?


P.S. Here's a little haiku I hardly had time to dream up:

Snore? Power tool?